Blind us for your sake - to see Your glory
I feel that the Lord is growing me so much... especially through my teaching experiences these past few weeks. One specific situation where I feel that the Lord has shown me the brightness of His glory in my life, as the brilliance of other "things" has lessened and become less appealing is in regard to the approval I've been seeking from men. I just want to be strong in all situations, I want to have "it" all together... but why?
"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong." (2 Corinthians 12: 9-10)
I don't want to be weak, I don't want to cry daily because I'm just "done and over" certain aspects of my days. But as I realize how good and glorifying it is to be weak, I do want to be it. It's okay... I get to see the fullness of the Lord's work when I humble myself and put aside my fleshly expectations of myself and draw closer to Him, seeking His guidance and approval.
A little over a month ago, after talking to my lead teacher for the first time, she said, "Sarah, you are going to be fresh air to us." I was enthusiastic about teaching, I was feeling ready, I was wanting to be that fresh air for her and the other teachers. But where I'm at now... the situations that I'm learning how to respond in, I'm just trying to search for some air, let alone try to be fresh air for others. I was starting to feel that I was failing her in this area because of the comment she made but the Lord has been showing and teaching me that in my right now, I may not be offering fresh air but I still have a lot to offer. Rising to the expectations of others really pales in comparison to rising to the call that God has upon my life.
"For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ." (Galatians 1:10)
